What is the point of neighbours keeping quiet after seeing domestic abuse?

SINGAPORE – The Hidden Struggles of Domestic Violence: Why We Need to Speak Up

Have you ever heard shouting or banging from your neighbours and wondered if you should intervene? For Natalie, an office administrator in Singapore, this was a reality. One night in 2022, she was startled by loud arguments coming from next door. Initially thinking it was just a heated family quarrel, she was shocked to discover that her neighbours were actually throwing objects against the wall. Her instinct was to call the police, but her husband urged her to respect their privacy, believing it was a family matter.

As the argument escalated, Natalie and her husband tried to make their presence known by loudly opening and shutting their windows. Thankfully, the fight ended quickly, but it left Natalie shaken. This incident is part of a worrying trend; reports of family violence in Singapore surged by 83% from 2020 to 2021.

Rising Reports of Domestic Violence

Statistics reveal that more Singaporeans are reaching out for help. In 2021, there were 5,190 reports of cybercrime, a slight increase from 5,134 in 2020. The National Anti-Violence Helpline (NAVH) received 10,800 calls in 2022, up from 8,400 in 2021. Alarmingly, around 3,000 of these inquiries were related to violence or abuse. Masagos Zulkifli, Minister for Social and Family Development, noted that less than 1.5% of child abuse cases were reported by the public. Most reports come from the victims themselves, highlighting a significant gap in community awareness and intervention.

The Need for Change in Mindset

Natalie’s experience reflects a common hesitation among neighbours. She refrained from calling the police out of concern for her neighbour’s family. The next day, she saw the mother with visible bruises, but when she offered help, she was told to keep quiet. This reluctance to intervene is echoed by many, including Muhammad Faishal Ibrahim, Minister of State for National Development, who emphasised the need for a shift in mindset regarding reporting abuse.

Victims often don’t recognise their situation as abusive. Marcus Lim from Touch Family Support pointed out that some victims might see their experiences as normal disagreements, not realising they are in an abusive relationship.

Community Support is Crucial

Sarah, a concerned neighbour, took action when she heard screaming from an apartment. She recorded the audio and sent it to social workers, hoping to get help for the family. This kind of intervention can be vital. However, many still hesitate due to fears of being seen as “busybody” or “kay-poh”.

Social workers like Ms. Corinna Li from Aware highlight that victims often lack the knowledge or confidence to escape their situations. Support from the community can make a significant difference.

How to Recognise Signs of Abuse

Recognising signs of domestic violence is essential. Look for physical signs like cuts and bruises, but also be aware of emotional changes. Victims may appear anxious, withdrawn, or fearful. Changes in behaviour at work, such as increased absences or a drop in performance, can also indicate distress.

If you suspect someone is in danger, consider reaching out. It’s better to be safe than sorry.

How to Help

If you witness domestic violence or suspect someone is being abused, here are some steps you can take:

– **Listen and Offer Support**: Let the victim know you’re there for them.
– **Contact Social Services**: Reach out to organisations like Touch Community Services or Aware for guidance.
– **Report If Necessary**: If you believe someone is in immediate danger, don’t hesitate to contact the police.

For immediate help, you can contact the National Anti-Violence and Sexual Harassment Helpline at 1800-777-0000, available 24/7. You can also use their online reporting form [here](https://go.helplines.org/navh-reporting-form/) or reach out via WhatsApp at 813-758-4895.

Conclusion: Together, We Can Make a Difference

It’s time for Singaporeans to change their mindset about domestic violence. It’s not just a private family matter; it’s a community issue. By speaking up and supporting one another, we can help break the cycle of violence. As Sun Xueling, Minister of State for Social and Family Development, stated, “No one should be silent.” Everyone has a role to play in creating a safer environment for all.

Let’s work together to ensure that no one feels unsafe in their own home. Remember, your voice can be the lifeline someone desperately needs.